Irritus U update AR15s and Trump

Special Lecture Notices:

'Irritus now conducts free lectures covering issues that are important to our public at large. Lectures will include timely topics that often confuse and complicate our simple message. Ambiguity in messaging can confuse our base and often even us.

Guns Safety and Slogans:

Citizens have every right to be safe in America, a massively armed society does not make anyone feel safe. Obviously it's important we support weapon manufacturers but at the same time our people must win re-election. So this lecture will cover how to avoid being looked upon as a nutcase with no concern for voter's safety. Topics include:

If your constituency is not full of rabid gun nuts how you can abstain from voting.

How to answer questions about the death of a loved one by unnecessary and once illegal automatic weapons.

How to appear sincerely concerned over children's deaths.

If your constituency, like Ted Cruz's, is full of gun nuts you're among the lucky ones. But death is final so try not to smile so much. We must appear caring.

Following the lecture there will be an open forum in which tactics going forward will be covered.

War Lecture

Another war, more deaths, more Muslim hatred of America, how do we talk about and defend the complexity that is the Middle East today and the hard part is how we justify all the spending that could help America, but instead is used to pay for cruise missiles?

Number one rule, always mention Hitler.

Then say we cannot look weak and the world is really on our side even if they are not.

Make sure collateral damage is aimed at the foes and is really their fault.

Bring home a badly wounded child to be used as a detraction from the horror of war, shows how much we care.

Praise the bravery of our people and the courage of our congress even though most would never serve in the military.

Remember always that with war come war profits and you know that mantra.

Our topics will be updated as topics and issues enter the public arena and confuse our base.



[Sorry, Our Faculty has not kept this up to date, some of our students are complaining as they don't always know what to say. We'll try to keep our course structure up to date. Thanks as always for your support.]

if this was not so true it would be funny

we can only hope that the dims stay/get more organized and the repugs keep the tea party

oh well
I pledge allegiance to the constitution of the United States of America as amended by the legislative and executive branches and interpreted by the Supreme Court

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America


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Several kudos are due this week for our finest graduates and spokesmen.

Ted Cruz was splendid in his use of 'lawlessness' and the associative power he brought to make executive orders seem lawless. Professor Sterculus PhD was proud of one of his favorite students and has added 'lawlessness' as a key term whenever used with our opposition's president. Read the brilliance of his words below.

"For all of those on the left who are willing to excuse the president’s lawlessness and disregarding federal law, there will come another president of the other party."

"Suppose the next president says, ‘I’m instructing the Treasury Department [to] no longer collect taxes at a higher rate than 25%,“That happens to be policy I agree with. I would love to see moving towards tax reform and lowering the top rates. And yet, that would be an extraordinarily bad outcome from the perspective of the Constitution and the protection of the liberty of the people." Cruz's remarks were on Glenn Beck’s radio program, a program we support and advertise on, but we must admit saying one of our goals out loud may have been a bit too brash, but you know Ted.

The Speaker of the House didn't miss this new use of 'lawlessness' and deftly used it to counter any progress on Immigration reform. Great move John, now we can keep our corporate sponsors happy with a continuation of their under the covers, and need we say underpaid, labor force. Great move, Johnnie.

Our third kudo goes to the right wing talking machine and its brilliant use of the CBO report as anti-jobs. It's critical we keep our voters confused over any benefits of Obamacare, the numerous press releases and comments from Representative Ryan, among others, called it a job killer and the constant repetition works as poll numbers for Paul Ryan demonstrate. Always remember regardless of truth, repetition works best. You go Paul.

More to follow - shred this document immediately after reading.

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Irritus Update: Confidential Important (internal document)

Two issues have surfaced that require new approaches to our educational concepts and core curriculum. Transgender bathrooms (TB) and Donald Trump (DT) complicate our mission to maintain privilege for our people and to education our students. We will cover the easier topic first.

While TB is complicated socially and not covered in any archaic religious document, for instance we can't point to the Bible for help, it confuses and stirs up our base support. It is a great distraction from the fact Mitch and Paul do nothing but talk in their positions of authority. It also supports States rights issues and our Professors and students are well aware of the power States rights have in maintaining privilege. If we treat it as we do abortion it is a winner, we do nothing that will cost money for our people, but we keep them occupied with another topic. If a liberal or socially conscious moral person should protest we bring up our daughters in a bathroom with a man. This one is easy, now to the tough one.

Donald Trump has changed the dynamic of our party but we must still stick together. Paul Ryan recently endorsed DT, while this sounds like a denial of all we believe in, and it is, we must keep quiet and support him for a SCOTUS selection is at stack and we can't have another judicial lawyer selected. We must have a known ideologue in the image of Antonin. But, and there are lots of buts, with DT, while he claims to be a conservative republican, even we aren't conservatives, only republicans who support our people, our corporations and our institutions of training. Donald confuses in so many areas it may become necessary to have a translator, say on Fox, change his phrases to conform to our meanings. Our people learn from Fox. For instance on taxes we must allow the low tax message to continue even if it has failed for eighty years and counting. This allows monies that could be used for roads and bridges to be used for our corporations, financial institutions and our wealthy benefactors. If a bridge fails, we use the old Cadillac ruse of our hero Ronnie, only now we'll have to make it a Lexus mom. 'If there weren't so many on food stamps and welfare that bridge would still be standing.' Listen folks we played these cards since Coolidge Hoover and refined them with Reagan Bush, we can do it again.

Summer School schedules will be revised and distributed soon. Keep the faith.

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Irritus Update - Internal Document Not For Public Distribution


But because our benefactors make more money on rifles and long guns it is critical we keep our message of gun safety consistent and constant. Our students and professors realize an AR15 in the home is overkill and if used by the frightened handler may kill the entire family as well as the intruder. Face it folks, many AR15 owners aren't the brightest bulb in the box as shown by all the accidental deaths. Bullet poof walls are being examined but may be too costly and difficult to install in trailers. So while none of our benefactors want to live next to some trigger happy weekend drunk armed with an AR15, we still need big sales, doesn't matter if sold based on dubious facts and confusing data. Irritus will publish the following info on right wing sites, gun hugger sites, and media such as FOX.

Why you need an AR15:

Burglars today often wear bullet proof clothing, your AR15 will penetrate most
Red scope attached to your AR15 guarantees clean kill with minimal home damage
Families must be instructed on first burst of firepower to hit the floor and stay there till all clear
Irreplaceable family pictures must be protected with bullet proof glass
Children's beds should be surrounded by bullet proof material if you can afford it
Wives, girlfriends, or adulterous relationships must know location of second or third bullet clip for quick delivery
Grandparents should sleep in basement or attic and floors must be reinforced
Apartments pose a particular problem as thin walls could cause you to shoot the old lady who lives next store
Family schedules should be reviewed daily so any late entry doesn't result in wasted bullets
Keep propane gas tank location clearly noted and protected as much as possible
Know where the water shutoff is in case of bursting pipes
Dogs cats fish birds and other household pets should be insured because they can't be moved or may even run into the line of fire

We need stories of AR15 saving the lives of people and hamsters because Americans love animals more than their neighbor. Play down all the accidental deaths and mass shootings. Stories like, 'while our walls are full of holes our cat lived through surgery for its missing leg.' The dog and fish may have died in the battle, but the intruder ran away. Grandma died happy in our bullet barrage, shouting 'shoot em' 'shoot em', she died for our freedom is on her tombstone. Stuff like that. Always remember stress freedom even if many causalities.

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Irritus U is happy that our standard bearer and presidential candidate Donald Trump has selected Mike Pence as his VP. Mike's values and votes in congress represent the values our college gives to its students. If America were ever able to have a stable fair society our benefactors and supporters would have to pay their fair share, and we cannot allow that to happen. We preach 'freedom' but that freedom must be controlled. Add to that a contented just society would be much harder to manipulate and thus elect representatives that stir up the pot of resentment over immigrants and minorities while supporting our people. Good luck Mike, Irritus supports you.

Voted NO on $15B bailout for GM and Chrysler. (Dec 2008)
Voted NO on $60B stimulus package for jobs, infrastructure, & energy. (Sep 2008)
Voted NO on revitalizing severely distressed public housing. (Jan 2008)
Voted NO on regulating the subprime mortgage industry. (Nov 2007)"
Future of conservatism demands traditional marriage. (Feb 2008)
Voted NO on prohibiting job discrimination based on sexual orientation. (Nov 2007)
Voted YES on Constitutionally defining marriage as one-man-one-woman. (Jul 2006)
Voted YES on making the PATRIOT Act permanent. (Dec 2005)
Voted YES on Constitutional Amendment banning same-sex marriage. (Sep 2004)
http://www.politifact.com/personalities/mike-pence/

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Special Alert: Historians on our man Trump

Irritus has learned historians are critically looking at our current presidential candidate. Irritus too has doubts concerning Donald Trump we'd much prefer the VP choice as his voting record is stellar. But our media maybe went too far in making government the problem and creating too many dog whistles about blacks, hispanics and others. But we cannot have Hillary Clinton elected. There is the possibility Hillary would be fair and impartial and this is something that could hurt outsourcing, taxes, and profit margins. Our base has been carefully created since the New Deal, we cannot got back to a more liberal, inclusive nation. The 1% need our support, plus maybe the next two or three percenters who pay our bills. See the historians piece here: https://www.facebook.com/historiansondonaldtrump/

Make sure this piece is not distributed and if mentioned just say it has been totally debunked. This tactic has worked for our base and should continue to work as they don't read and only watch Fox. Shred this document upon reading.

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Updated 08/04/16

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